I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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