What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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