I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
