Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
