Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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