his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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