Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
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