Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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