There is no way he is gay with that hair.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
be right there i have to get my cape
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
