We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
