I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i was born a porn star she said
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
