I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
