I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
