I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
