He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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