When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
