Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
