dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
