My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
