It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
