she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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