stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
