Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Sober January is a disaster.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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