Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
