All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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