Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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