She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
then he tried to convert me to islam
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize