i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
