Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
