We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
