belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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