You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
You did what with his pubic hair?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
