Swine flu. Run for my life!
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
