Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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