garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
