Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
