look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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