Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
