you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
