Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
