Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
