Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
