your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
