This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
