I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
