North Korea, Best Korea!
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize