It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
