I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize