Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
