Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You can't motorboat a personality
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
